Sunday, July 20, 2008

Top Ten Epic

For our last and final category here is AFI's list of the top ten films in the "Epic" genre (supposedly):

1. Lawrence of Arabia (predictably)
2. Ben-Hur (just)
3. Schindler's List (right)
4. Gone With The Wind (ok)
5. Spartacus (naturally)
6. Titanic (Do Whaaa?!!)
7. All Quiet on the Western Front (Really, an epic?)
8. Saving Private Ryan (good, but 8, and epic?)
9. Reds (Oh no they didn't)
10. The Ten Commandments (at number 10, ironically)

So I guess "War" films are epics then, well in that case where is Patton or The Longest Day or Apocalypse Now? I don't expect box-office swelling soccer moms to get that Titanic totally sucks but I would expect "experts" at the American Film Institute to get that! Geez, will justice never prevail? I know, I'm out of order... well, you're out of order, the whole movie voting system is out of order! I object strenously your honor! (I should have learned from Demi Moore that it doesn't work that way.)

Anyway, I can think of a few better epics than Reds or Titanic, like for instance Ghandi, or Braveheart or even Gladiator. Do you mean not one Harry Potter movie is good enough to make this list? Darn right, and besides that would be fantasy, moron! I just called myself a moron.

Well, looking at these AFI lists was fun and took up a lot of time we will never get back. At least that's more than you could say about the average Adam Sandler movie.

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