Gene Simmons
VS
Richard Simmons
The Demon lunges at Richard but slides right off the three inch layer of grease covering the disco aerobic superstar. Richard does a few girly leg kicks to the back of Gene's head while singing "I'm gonna sweat and roll all night, and disco every day!" This enfuriates Gene who quickly gets to his feet and puts out one of Richard's eyes with his unnatural demon tongue. Richard of course never breaks stride with his signature smile and extremely non-masculine aerobics, but it's only a ruse. Gene spits blood and spews fire at the "patron mascot of gay threads" setting the greaseball alight, his afro shooting bonfire-like flames into the sky. Gene calmly calls his agent and prepares for another "reunion world tour". Alas, if only another similarly named celeb could put us all out of our misery! Stay tuned...
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